8 Habits stopping you from Finding a Match

Whether you use social media or you navigate bars and clubs, there are surefire ways of messing up dating opportunities. Getting too drunk is one of them, but there are habits we develop over time that can be worse. When we are teenagers, we try extra hard to be the cool guy, not knowing that being you is what counts.

With age and a little more experience, we still fall under a few traps. These traps stop us from fully enjoying a possible long-term relationship. Finding a match is easy on social media until it is not. Leaving social media and joining others in real-life situations can be unnerving, and we sometimes fall flat on our faces.

As we leave one relationship for another on there are tricks for quicker connections.

1. Comfort zones

Get out of your comfort zone and find women or men outside. This comfort zone could be a restaurant, the web, or your living room. It could also be what makes you feel guarded. Many of us have an ideal person or place we would like to meet them. Try using online dating and see how that works as opposed to relying on mutual connections.

2. Standards

Higher standards and higher expectations almost always lead to disappointments. When you set unreasonably high expectations and won’t budge, you will likely be perpetually unhappy. Try to amend or revise your standards slightly to match what is around you. You may be surprised to find your match in unexpected ways.

3. Self-pity

Some of us wallow in self-pity after several messed-up relationships. This is the worst approach to finding a match. Incidentally, you will attract preying men who are looking for vulnerable women. As opposed to feeling sorry for yourself, you should regain your confidence and get back in the dating field.

4. The company you keep

Ever heard the saying misery loves company? This could not be further from the truth. Avoid hanging around people with one hundred percent negativity regarding relationships. They only add gas to the fire, where there should not be any. These unhealthy relationships lead many to drinking and hating men, or women, for no reason.

5. Avoid exes

If you broke up with someone, get over it. There is a very good reason why the two of you are longer together. Stalking or trolling them on social media pages does no good. It only harms your chances of finding a match. If you constantly follow her, you might bring back feelings that you fought hard to outgrow. It only leads to depression and more stalking.

6. Social media messes

When you post too much on social media handles, it is not received well by potential mates. Too much personal stuff on social media concerns you as a person, including challenges, relationship issues, and the like. As people seek friends and a match online, they will be deterred from trying to be acquainted with you. It only hinders the matchmaking process and as you develop more followers, you lose more potential.

7. Evolve

Try to move forward as opposed to looking at past relationships. These only make you dwell on the past and what could have been. When you keep saying should’ve, would’ve could’ve it never ends well. Instead, find new hobbies and try to transform yourself. It is about letting the pain of past relationships make you stronger, not weaker.

8. Settling

When we settle for whoever comes our way, we are constantly disappointed. It gets worse because we now develop self-loathing and become convinced we are unlovable. Being impatient with ourselves and life is a no-no. Take time to peruse online dating sites and engage with mutual friends. Your match is yet to come.

Bottom Line

Finding a match requires some finesse and less pressure. It also needs self-awareness and belief that there is a perfect match for us out there. Do not settle but rather, put in the effort today for a much better relationship tomorrow. 

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